YAY!! I finally got my blog back! After a long process that included lawyers, I have my new hobby back. Yes, I know I could have started a new one, with a different name, but I loved the idea of this blog, I just have to tweek it...A LOT!
As of late February, I can no longer tell you my hideous love triangle/soap opera of 2010, but I can keep you updated on the new me that I started on March 14, 2011!
If you are my friend on Facebook and actually read what I ramble about, you will know that I am on a weight loss kick. I have struggled with my weight pretty much all of my life. I've been made fun of, been told many hateful things, believed I would never fit in....all the whiny cliche idioms that they make Lifetime Movies about...and I would randomly diet here and there, lose weight, gain it back (plus 15) and I finally said this year was it.
It was mainly brought about thanks to one of the doctors at my office. As most of you know, I work at a very large OBGYN office in Lawrenceville for the past 7 years. Dr Kim is our resident health guru. He has recently been going to some bariatric conferences, so that he can better explain and teach his patients how important it is to eat healthy and be in a healthy lifestyle. He offered a class to us at lunch time one day in February and from then on, our office has tried to be on a health kick. He taught about good carbs, bad carbs, food groups and many essential (and annoying) items in our diet that we have to/need to get rid of.
Working at our office has it's advantages -drug rep lunches- he also noticed that most of the lunches that were being brought in weren't so healthy. He ended up talking to our reps to make sure they brought a "healthy alternative" with the meals that were being brought it.
Everyone started out gung-ho with the plan to get healthy and lose weight. Dr Kim would have us weigh in at the beginning of the week and once a month we would get our abdominal circumference checked by one of our nurse pracitioners.
I'm not sure I wanna divulge this starting weight and circumference from that first initial day...but in time I will be proud of how different those numbers are from where I end up.
I tried to follow what all we were to do for our "healthy" initiative, but after two to three weeks I felt stifled and pressured to impress Dr Kim....I honestly gave up the initiative, though I did try to stick with the healthier eating.
My weight yo-yo'd over the next couple weeks and after a trip to California to see my best friend, Christy and a very, very scary and upsetting confrontation with the drama king of 2010...I knew something needed to happen. On the plane ride to and from California, I had to stretch the damn seat belt to its limits to get it to fasten....thank GOODNESS I didn't have to ask for an extender, then I would have been a basket case. My rear-end fit quite snugly in the seat which made the long flight oh so enjoyable. I kept thinking, NOT COOL and Ugh...I felt disgusted with myself and I couldn't believe how I had turned out. Then drama king, who has a way of slicing you with his silver tongue, made quite a few remarks that cut deep down to the bone not two minutes after trying to flatter me with sweet words. Let's just say the sweet words were ruined and the mean, nasty, hateful remarks stuck around and bled!
After two weeks of sulking and being an idiot, it clicked....I needed to do this for myself and my family! Not because I want to prove him or the plane wrong, but for me to know that that isn't me and I am worth being around for myself and my family. I NEED to do this so that I can be around for my most wonderful and spectacular accomplishment, Skyler. I found myself making excuses when he wanted to do stuff that required a lot of activity. "Welp, buddy, we can't do that because you've had a bad attitude"..."Sorry, dude...Mommy has to work on some stuff for work (we don't have take home work!)...and I'd end up playing on the computer, sitting in front of the TV and wasting 2-3 hours a night. Not cool....March 13, 2011 is the CLICK day and I vowed that starting March 14, 2011 things will change. I will get back to a healthy weight and BMI. Exercise is to be a staple, not just something I'd do here and there because that is what you are "supposed to do." I remembered back in 2005 that I did the South Beach diet and lost a nice amount of weight, all of which, I gained back plus quite a few more...but I knew that it was doable and it would come off easier if I tried it again...and KNEW it would stay off if I actually exercised.
I weighed in on Monday March 14, 2011 and gasped as I weighed more than when we started our "healthy initiative" at work (that made my BMI high enough to qualify for bariatric surgery)...but it was my starting point...and after lots of prayer and encouragement from Skyler and my parents...and a handful of friends who knew I was starting again...I knew that would NOT be my ending point.
FAST FORWARD 4 months into my new me project...and I am down 40lbs - I have lost 10lbs a month which I set for my first 5 month goals. My overall goal is to lose 110lbs and I have set smaller goals so that I think it will be easier for me to stay focused and feel like I can meet them.
So, in short...this revised blog will be about keeping my friends and loved ones updated on how I am doing and progressing...and I'm hoping in return to get some encouragement to get me through the tough times...and to celebrate with me during the awesome times....I.Me.Wed is still fitting...I am not worrying about love and a relationship until I would want to marry and love myself!
Next goal...to hit 45lbs down by the time Christy, Billy...and new baby Liam make it to town the 1st week in August! Christy is my best friend since 2003 and has been one of my biggest supporters...I wanna show her that her love and encouragement has helped me! She saw me at my biggest weight...and I wanna show her that I will never be that way again.